A Poem to Baffle Your Brain

Nothing quite blog-worthy happened this week.  Although, school has provided me with boatloads of homework which, in turn, has resulted in little sleep these past seven days and lots of stress.  Here I thought fourth quarter was going to be a tad easier.  Well, It looks like I was wrong.  But I’m not here to complain or rant about my problems because life could be worse and I should appreciate what I have.  Besides, I highly doubt you readers of this post would enjoy it.

That being said, I must not suffer alone!  Therefore, I hereby present to you a poem!

What?

Are you not scared?

Does a piece of poetry not frighten you?



Oh right, I forgot.  It is a poem...full of CONTRADICTIONS!  Mwah ha ha ha haaaaaa!  DISCLAIMER: THIS IS NOT MY WORK.  (I wish I could write something this cool.)  Credit goes to these websites: here and here.  Also, there is no specific author due to the characteristic of it being a folk poem so it was passed down to the point where no one remembers who actually came up with it and there are multiple variations of the poem too.  One would find these variations in the links above.

Now, the moment you've all been waiting for...

Ladies and gentlemen, hoboes and tramps,

Cross-eyed mosquitoes and bow-legged ants,

I come before you to stand behind you,

To tell you something I know nothing about.

Next Thursday, which is Good Friday,

There will be a Mother's Day meeting for fathers only;

Admission is free, so pay at the door,

Pull up a seat and sit on the floor.

The topic to discuss...

The crime that has never been committed.

One bright day in the middle of the night

Two dead boys got up to fight.

Back to back, they faced each other,

Drew their swords and shot each other.

One was blind and the other couldn't, see

So they chose a dummy for a referee.

A blind man went to see fair play,

A dumb man went to shout "hooray!"

A paralyzed donkey passing by,

Kicked the blind man in the eye,

Knocked him through a nine inch wall,

Into a dry ditch and drowned them all,

A deaf policeman heard the noise

Came and shot the two dead boys.

If you don’t believe this lie is true,

Ask the blind man, he saw it, too.

And the narrator,

With his story untold,

Meekly whispered,

Loud and bold,

The beginning words,

To the meeting's end,


"You, my enemy,


Are now my friend,

Thank you for your very kind unattention,

I will now proceed to tell you about the four corners of the round table.

Four corners to a round table,

Figure it out if you are able."

Isn’t poetry just great?  Perhaps, you feel like this:

Image courtesy of Troll Me

Do not fret puzzled reader, it will be okay.

Well, I hope you got some amusement from reading the poem and that your brain is at least a little perplexed. :)